Once upon a hoopty...

Okay, so, I am a boy and so when valentine's day rolls around and I don't have anyone, I don't really care. I congratulate myself on not having to spend exorbitant amounts of money to prove that I love someone and go about with my day as usual. Things were no different this year. This brings me to roughly one week later when I get back into town and realize that every girl I know who is single is not only really bummed about no one treating them special on the one special day, but also being very verbal about it. Not a problem, it's all good. Better to let it out that hold it all in. But it gets me to realizing how much I really wish i wasn't single. And even though valentine's day slipped by me this year completely unnoticed, i find myself thinking a lot about the fairer sex, missed opportunities, girls I know that could be potential girlfriends/something more down the line, and hoping and praying that I'll find HER soon. The funny part is that besides the whole "mission rules" and everything...and the fact that I don't have the time to keep up a healthy relationship, I am a chicken turd. Rejection is probably my greatest fear. I mean, send me lions, tigers, men with machetes, long mountainous climbs, but please don't put me in a situation where I have to figure out where to sit. I seriously have major anxiety everytime I go to church because I don't know if the people I want to sit next to want to sit next to me. It's a bit silly, but if I were to genuinely like someone and find out that they would have prefered for someone else to sit next to them, ...i don't know what I would do, but I'd probably be depressed for a good week, assuming something happened all week to cheer me up. So, this is just finding a seat in church and has nothing to do with girls. So if there's a girl who I think is pretty cool and I want to get to know her better, I try to find an opportunity to talk to her or something, but usually I have absolutely nothing to say. So I just don't go talk to her. I suffer through small pleasantries and then ashamedly wander off when I can't think of anything worthwhile to say. So, on that note, I'm going out for coffee with a friend of mine who lived in Nicaragua last year and taught at the school. I haven't seen her in a while, so I think we'll have a lot to talk about...and if not, I'll just wander off.